Looking back at 2010

It's past 6pm, New Year's Eve here now. Only hours left of 2010! Thought now may be a good time to look back at the year which is about to end. 2010 has been both good, bad and outright ugly. It's not without bittersweet feelings I look back at 2010.

The year started just so so with some till this day unexplained stomach pain which didn't go away for months. The summer was great with some great weeks in China. Autumn has been outright ugly in the first half with my husband leaving me in September and the depression I went through because of that. I turned 25 in October and had a great weekend with family at that time. In November I found happiness in my life again when having video chats with friends from around the world one weekend, and the weekend after that I found the meaning of life through starting to listen to Queen seriously.

My meaning of life is to help people, spread awareness, knowledge and acceptance and help in every way I can with finding a cure for Diabetes and HIV/AIDS.

I feel this passion in life, something I found thanks to Queen. I found my old music interest again, have started to learn to play my keyboard properly. I have plans on taking up violin playing again, I practice singing on my own and want to start playing guitar. I have this dream to sing and play for charity one day.

December hasn't been purely a dance on roses though. I've has issues with joint pain on and off for a long time but the pain has increased along with now affecting many more of my joints. The other week I discovered I'm actually hyper flexible in many joints, and that may well be the reason why I'm in pain all the time. I suspect I may have Ehler's Danlo's Syndrome or as it is mostly written: EDS.

So all in all. This year has changed my life in many ways, in some ways good changes, in other ways bittersweet.

It is with curiosity and a straight back I welcome 2011 in a few hours time.

Happy New Year :)

Christmas

Today it's Christmas eve, the day when we in Sweden celebrate Christmas. My parents and I went to my grandmother in Gothenburg to celebrate and a couple of hours ago we came back home, with grandmother.
The day has been spent relaxing, watching Disney on TV and of course, the Christmas gifts. I'm happy with the gifts I got and everyone else was happy too :)

Tomorrow my aunts and cousins are coming over for the traditional Turkey dinner we always host at home on Christmas Day. I really hope everyone can come.

I took some pictures today both at home and at my Grandmother's place. Will upload some of them later when I've transferred them to my laptop, right now they're only in my camera.

It's been a very white Christmas this year! Think Disney Christmas movies ;) I've NEVER before seen this much snow on Christmas eve, and it hasn't been warmer than -9 or -10 degrees C all day! And it was snowing when we were driving home from Gothenburg. It's really quite amazing! Today is really the kind of Christmas eve/Christmas day you only see in movies.

I just find it quite annoying that, despite having vacation since I was off work on Tuesday, my wrists, elbows and knee is still aching :(
But anyways...



Merry Christmas everyone :)

The final preparations

Trying to prepare as much as possible at home today for my trip home to parents on Tuesday. Did the laundry and dishes today, and going to at least start packing I think. But it is getting kinda late now so I maybe should get my hair dry and sleep instead and finish everything tomorrow after work.

Now I really need to do something, either dry my hair or start packing!

Maybe that's the answer...

I've always been quite flexible, especially when I was about 10-12 years old I could have become a contortionist easily had I just practiced for it.
For the past several years I've had problems with especially my right knee being bent backwards when I don't pay attention to how I'm standing and I'm often having joint pain somewhere in my body. I also have over flexible fingers and wrists and ankles and feet.
As said, I'm almost always having pain somewhere. Back pain for me is a daily issue I've had to learn to live with. Since summer my wrists have started to act up and become painful from time to time so I sometimes need to wear wrist support to ease the pain. I need to take painkillers to go to work many days, but it's not often it helps at all.
All in all, I can't even remember when I had a completely pain free day last time.

I came into this hyper mobility forum the other day, and started reading about hyper mobility syndrome and EDS, and the more I read about it, the more likely it seems I may be having either hyper mobility syndrome or EDS, so many things fit in, including the trouble with painkillers not working well!

Think I'll have to contact my doctor after New Year's and ask him if he can test me for EDS and hyper flexibility or send me to someone who can!

Christmas party at work.

Yesterday it was Christmas party at work. It was my 3rd time attending it and I must say, this year it didn't quite reach its usual standards. The food was good, but really, Italian food on a Christmas party? And there was far too little entertainment. I think most people was kinda disappointed really. The best Christmas party at work was definitely last year! Last year the whole evening was just so much fun!
Yesterday I went home even before the music started, partly because I was bored and partly because I was so tired after working so much overtime lately.

Today I'm so sleepy, I took an emergency nap in the afternoon and ended up sleeping for about 4 hours. Thanks heaven it's only 2 more days of work before I go up to my parents place for Christmas! I only work Monday and Tuesday and then on Tuesday after work I take the train up to my parents and have vacation until January 3rd :)

Time for an update

I haven't been posting for a few days now, and it has its good reasons for sure!
I'm really busy at work and work generally 9-10 hours per day now and when I finally do get home at about 7pm I rush into the shower and then only spend a little time at computer before drying my hair and go to sleep. I try to be in bed before 10pm and lights off at 11pm at the latest.
Tomorrow it's finally Friday again, but not just any Friday! It's Christmas Party at work tomorrow evening! I'm of course attending it, but I have no idea for how long I'll stay as I will be getting up at about 5am tomorrow morning, work all day and then attend the party, after a work week with currently 6 hours overtime shared between 3 days.

I'm the least to say, pretty tired when I get home, and do as little as possible really.

In the weekend I'll also be pretty busy. Need to prepare as much as possible at home and pack my bag for my trip home on Tuesday directly after work. I want everything packed and ready before Monday, possibly with exception for items I need to use on Tuesday morning, like my hair brush.

Now I'd better back my backpack with the things I'm going to bring to work tomorrow as I'll stay at work to shower and change clothes before the party starts. Then off to dry hair and go to bed!

Long week and short weekend

It is a normal week in other words, except for this week being about 10h longer than a usual week as I've been working a lot of overtime. If I counted right on Friday evening after work, I had done 47.5h of work this week, compared to my normal 37h!

It's less than 2 weeks to go until Christmas eve now, and I'm sad to say it, but Christmas spirit just hasn't found me just yet. I love advent time and Christmas, but this year... Well, I have barely even started listening to Christmas carols yet! Right now I'm playing Hayley Westenra's Winter Magic on iTunes, but music wise right now, I wish Queen had made a whole Christmas album!

I'm pretty much done with Christmas shopping now anyways. Bought some more presents yesterday and I'm done with what I can buy here in Copenhagen. The last couple of things I'll buy on the 22nd when I'm in my hometown.

As for Christmas cards... Sorry people, I don't really send any these days. I don't even have time to go to the post office to send any due to my work schedule :( And as I live in Denmark. ALL cards would be international which means I'd have to go to the post office to send them, and the post is not open when I'm not working... I'll simply just wish everyone a Merry Christmas online or through the cards my parents send to people.

Hmm bit difficult to type today. I have this strange cut on my left index finger just at the fingertip, it makes typing feel slightly odd but the worst part is: I don't know when or how I got that cut! I can't remember touching anything sharp with that finger and as I'm currently mainly left handed, it's my right hand getting the most cuts. I didn't notice this cut until I did some dishes just before...

Now I'd better start preparing the laundry bag. Have laundry at 4pm and would rather not have to gather all the laundry 5 minutes before today :P

A Monday from hell again?

One could think so anyways. But this Monday has one advantage compared to other Mondays: This year is about to run out of Mondays!
Monday is that day of the week I'd like to rip out of the calendar, burn the pages and deny its existence!
When transportation to and/or from work is delayed for one reason or another, that just makes my Monday mood even worse! Today my train home was 6 minutes delayed and it pretty much ruined my whole evening.

On a more positive side though... Yesterday my nose piercing turned 2 weeks old, and it's behaving perfectly. In fact, it already pretty much feels healed! But I'll still wait for a few more weeks before treating is as a healed piercing. Now I still treat it like a healing one :)

It looks like it may have started snowing a little outside again. Yesterday it was snowing quite a lot, but today has been mainly sunny and first day above zero for about 1.5-2 weeks. But at just 1-2 degrees, not much happened with the already existing snow. I think this year may well be a White Christmas all over Sweden and Denmark! I hope it will be, most of the time we're just dreaming of a white Christmas even though it's cold and winter here at Christmas time :P

Christmas shopping!

So yesterday I went over to Malmö for some Christmas shopping, and to take a look in this music store I had seen so many times from the bus. First thing I did after getting off the train at Malmö central station was to go to that music shop, and wow, what a place! So much instruments, sheet music high and low and everything you can imagine for playing music! I bought a couple of beginner books for keyboard, or actually, one beginner book for keyboard and one chord book for piano. I have been playing keyboard a bit before, or OK, most of my life, but on small toy keyboards. This keyboard I have now is a big one. I've had it for years but never really played much on it and that is so going to change now!
Until now, I've only been playing keyboard or piano by ear, I only read sheet music for violin and a little for flute. But with this new passion for music I've got in the past few weeks, I've decided to learn playing my keyboard properly and read sheet music too!

Anyways, after I had been to that music store. I went further into town for some Christmas shopping and managed to almost finish my Christmas shopping! I only have a couple more planned things to buy now, but that's things I'll buy in my hometown in a small local shop, partly because the items I'm going to buy is a bit inconvenient to bring on the train, but mainly because I know the shop owner and want to keep the local shops at home alive.

Today I went shopping again, this time in Copenhagen at the big shopping center Field's which is just a few minutes away from where I live. Bought a couple more Christmas presents and did some general grocery shopping. After shopping today, I did my traditional Sunday laundry.

Now I think I'll play some keyboard for a while. Going to try to make it into a daily habit to practice every day :)

Fun conversation with mum

Was just on the phone with mum and mentioned that a friend of mine, Anna, is going on a cruise tomorrow and having to get up very early to catch the flight and that the security check may take a bit longer due to Anna having type 1 diabetes and wearing an insulin pump. Mums reaction? A pump? Is her diabetes that bad? DOH! I had to give my dear mother a whole lecture about pumps and diabetes! Told her that diabetes is not "worse" just because someone is wearing a pump. A pump is a personal choice and can enable better control by being able to fine tune the dose more than with injections.

I think the message got through anyways, as mum went onto saying "But I haven't heard about many using pumps here" and that is true, told mum it's most likely due to the cost and Sweden not having private medical insurance system like USA and Canada has. It's the regions that pays for pumps in Sweden, so it's a bit more picky when it comes to who gets a pump and not. As far as I know, the pump is just for rent, but it's the consumables which costs a whole farm compared to the cost for injections. I'm not very into how pumping works in Sweden though. But I do know it's not the most common way of treating Type 1 diabetes in Sweden.

Can I say mission accomplished now? I think mum learned something new about diabetes today!

World AIDS day!

Today is the day to do what should be done everyday all year really! Spread awareness, kill myths, get rid of the shame and taboo and fight for a cure for HIV/AIDS! This horrible disease has killed millions world wide and more and more people around the world are diagnosed everyday!
I'm healthy and thankful for that, but I really feel for those people who have their lives ruined by HIV/AIDS and want to do what I can to help!
So let's kill off some of the taboo and show support for people who live with HIV+ and their families and friends!

A thing about HIV you hear far too often is that it's some kind of "God's punishment to gay men" because gay men have a higher rate of HIV+ than the hetero population. That is just so wrong! Their sexual preference and use of the "back door" just puts them at a higher risk because the virus seems to be absorbed more easily, and too few consider that risk and don't use protection. But anyone can get infected with HIV! Sexual preference doesn't matter, all it takes is some bad luck, and maybe a few too many sex partners you don't know along with not using condom or the condom broke. My opinion on sexuality is that Love is Love, no matter if someone is gay, bi or hetero. Love is the most beautiful thing in the world! But gay men out there, please do get tested and use protection and stay safe!

Another common category of HIV+ is drug addicts who share needles with others. Needles should never ever be shared! I wish the society would take better care of drug addicts, help them get rid of the addiction and help them back into the society. Many who resort to taking illegal drugs want to quit, but can't! And they may have got stuck with it because of some traumatic experience in the past. The drugs became some kind of relief from the emotional pain. They need help, and until they can quit the drugs, they need sterile equipment and safe environments to prevent the spread of HIV and other infections.

When it comes to the HIV/AIDS rate in developing countries, it's just tragic there's not enough information and lack of money so people don't use protection, along with the myth that having sex with a virgin will cure HIV/AIDS. There are many cases in especially parts of Africa where young HIV- women will be raped by a HIV+ man who believe it will cure him. Unfortunately it just makes it likely that the woman will be infected too, should she become pregnant there's a possibility that the child will be or become HIV+ too, or see the parents die from AIDS a few years later.

Many with the diagnose live in developing countries and too few have access to the medication they need to keep the HIV from turning into AIDS.
But that's were you and I can do a difference! If you can, make a donation to your local AIDS fund! It doesn't cost much and you will help saving lives! If you can't make a donation, then you can wear something red to show your support
So many children around the world are orphans today because AIDS took their parents. It's just not right! There just HAS to be a cure!


Another problem with HIV is that people often live for years without knowing they're infected, it's a virus working in silence, killing slowly and symptoms usually don't come until years later. Just look at what HIV did with Freddie Mercury! He went from looking perfectly healthy to withering away in just a few years, and he had the infection for many years before he found out, he had already developed AIDS when he got the diagnose.

If you know someone who is HIV+ do show your love and support, and help that person as much as you can! Don't behave as if HIV spreads in the air- that's what flu and colds do! But if you do have a flu or a cold you should maybe try to stay away from the person you know who has HIV as that person may be more sensitive to infections than fully healthy people.

If you have HIV, don't let it stop you from living your life to the fullest! Just do take extra care if you get a cut or something and always use protection. Don't hide your condition, there's tons of support to be found. You should not have to go through everything alone! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT THAT YOU GOT INFECTED!



Who am I then? Well, I'm a 25 year old woman with a passion for awareness and helping others. I'm perfectly healthy myself, and wish EVERYONE could be just as healthy!

With all this being said, I shall get off my soap box and continue practice singing so I can one day start my dream: The awareness choir!